What to Do When Someone Misses Their Check-in

You've been added as an emergency contact for someone using a daily check-in app. That's a sign of trust and responsibility. But what should you actually do if you receive an alert that they've missed their check-in? This practical guide will walk you through the exact steps to take.

First Rule: Don't Panic, But Don't Ignore

A missed check-in doesn't automatically mean an emergency. People forget, phones die, and life happens. But it does mean you need to take action. The key is to respond promptly and systematically.

Understanding the Alert System

Most daily check-in apps, including DailyOK, have a grace period built in. Here's how it typically works:

The person schedules check-ins at specific times (e.g., 8 AM and 8 PM)
If they don't check in within 30-60 minutes, the system sends an alert
You receive a notification via text, email, or app notification
The alert will tell you which check-in was missed and when

This means if someone's check-in was at 8 AM and you get an alert at 8:30 AM, they've already been unreachable for at least 30 minutes.

Your Response Protocol: Step by Step

Step 1: Try to Contact Them Immediately (First 5 Minutes)

What to do:

Call their phone - Try 2-3 times. Let it ring fully each time. They might be in the bathroom, shower, or somewhere they can't easily grab the phone.
Send a text message - Something like "Hey, got an alert you missed your check-in. Are you okay? Please respond ASAP."
Try alternate contact methods - If you have it, try video calling, WhatsApp, Facebook Messenger, or any other communication method they use.

What you're looking for: Any sign of response. Even if they don't answer the phone, you might hear it ringing in the background if you're calling their home phone, or you might see "typing..." on a text message.

Step 2: Assess the Situation (Next 5-10 Minutes)

Consider these factors:

Is this unusual? Have they missed check-ins before? Some people are forgetful; others are always punctual.
What time of day is it? A missed morning check-in when they're usually asleep could just mean they overslept. But if they're usually up by then, it's more concerning.
Do you know their schedule? Could they be at a doctor's appointment, the gym, or somewhere with no phone signal?
How are they feeling lately? Have they mentioned not feeling well, or are they recovering from illness or surgery?
What's the weather? Severe weather can cause power outages (phone dead) or prevent them from getting to their phone.

Document: Make a quick note of when you received the alert and what you've tried. This will be useful if you need to call emergency services.

Step 3: Contact Other People Who Might Know (10-15 Minutes)

If you still can't reach them, expand your search:

Call other emergency contacts - If there are other people listed, contact them. They might have heard from the person, or they might be closer and able to check in person.
Contact neighbors - If you have phone numbers for any of their neighbors, ask them to knock on the door or check if they've seen them.
Call their regular places - If it's during business hours, call their gym, hairdresser, doctor's office, or anywhere they might have an appointment.
Check recent communication - Look at your recent texts or emails. Did they mention plans that might explain why they're unavailable?

Step 4: Decide on Next Steps (15-20 Minutes)

At this point, you have three options:

Option A: Go Check in Person (if you live nearby)

Best option if you're within 20-30 minutes
Bring your phone and keep trying to call as you drive
Let someone else know you're going and ask them to be on standby
When you arrive, ring the doorbell, knock loudly, try calling their phone (you might hear it inside)

Option B: Send Someone Else to Check (if you're far away)

Coordinate with another emergency contact, neighbor, or friend
Ask them to check and report back immediately
Stay on the phone with them if possible while they check

Option C: Call for a Wellness Check (if options A & B aren't available)

Call the local police non-emergency number and request a wellness check
Explain that your loved one missed their daily check-in and you cannot reach them
Provide the address and any relevant medical information
Mention if they have medical conditions, mobility issues, or recent health concerns

When to Call 911 Immediately

Skip the gradual response and call 911 right away if:

The person has serious medical conditions (heart disease, stroke risk, diabetes, seizures, etc.)
They recently had surgery or a medical procedure
They mentioned not feeling well recently
They have a history of falls or mobility issues
You hear something concerning when you call (phone ringing but sounds of distress, smoke alarm, etc.)
It's been multiple hours since the missed check-in and you've exhausted all other options
They've never missed a check-in before and are extremely reliable
Your gut is telling you something is seriously wrong

When calling 911, say something like: "I need to request a wellness check. My [mother/friend/etc.] lives alone at [address]. She missed her daily check-in this morning at 8 AM, and I cannot reach her by phone. She's 68 years old and has [mention any medical conditions]. I'm worried something may have happened."

What You'll Need When Calling Emergency Services

Emergency Information Checklist

Have this information ready when calling police or EMTs:

Full name and address
Age
Medical conditions
Current medications
Allergies
Recent health issues or surgeries
Whether they live alone
How long they've been unreachable
What you've tried so far
Whether they have mobility issues or use assistive devices
If there are pets in the home (EMTs need to know)
How to access the home (is there a spare key? Lockbox code?)

Pro tip: The person you're monitoring should provide you with this information when they add you as an emergency contact. If you don't have it, ask them to create an emergency information sheet and share it with all emergency contacts.

False Alarms Happen - And That's Okay

According to data from check-in services, approximately 95% of missed check-ins are false alarms:

Phone battery died
Got distracted and forgot
Unexpected early morning appointment
Fell back asleep after alarm
Traveling and lost track of time zones
Lost phone or left it somewhere

Don't feel embarrassed about "overreacting." The 5% of times when it's not a false alarm make the system worthwhile. Sarah's story (featured on our blog) is a perfect example - she had a stroke at 3 AM, couldn't reach her phone, and was found because of a missed check-in alert.

What to Say When It's a False Alarm

When you finally reach them and everything is fine, don't make them feel guilty. Say something like: "I'm so relieved you're okay! Your phone battery died? No worries - this is exactly what the system is for. Can you just plug it in and do your check-in when you get a chance?" Keep it light and positive. You want them to continue using the system, not feel bad about it.

After the Incident: Learning and Adjusting

Whether it was a false alarm or a real emergency, use it as a learning opportunity:

If it was a false alarm:

Discuss what happened and how to prevent it in the future
Maybe they need a phone charging reminder, or the check-in time should be different
Consider adding a backup emergency contact
Make sure they understand it's okay that you responded - better safe than sorry

If it was a real emergency:

Document what happened and what worked well in your response
Update emergency contact information if anything has changed
Consider whether the check-in frequency should increase (twice daily instead of once)
Discuss whether additional safety measures are needed (medical alert pendant, motion sensors, etc.)
Update the emergency information sheet with any new medical details

Taking Care of Yourself

Being an emergency contact comes with emotional responsibility. Here's how to manage it:

Don't catastrophize: Remember that most alerts are false alarms. Respond appropriately but don't assume the worst.
Have a plan: Knowing exactly what to do reduces anxiety when an alert comes.
Share the responsibility: Don't be the only emergency contact. Having others helps distribute the mental load.
Set boundaries: If alerts are happening frequently due to forgetfulness, work with the person to find solutions.
Trust the system: The check-in system means you don't have to worry constantly - the app is monitoring, so you can focus on being their loved one instead of their supervisor.

Quick Reference Guide

Print or save this timeline for quick reference:

Missed Check-in Response Timeline

0-5 minutes: Call, text, try alternate contact methods
5-10 minutes: Assess situation, consider context and factors
10-15 minutes: Contact other emergency contacts, neighbors, regular places
15-20 minutes: Decide: Go in person, send someone, or call for wellness check
20+ minutes (or immediately if high risk): Call 911 if still no contact

The Bottom Line

Being an emergency contact is an honor and a responsibility. Your role is simple: when you get an alert, respond promptly and systematically. Don't panic, but don't ignore it either.

Most of the time, you'll find they just forgot or their phone died. But occasionally - maybe once in your entire time as an emergency contact - you'll be the reason help arrives in time to save their life or prevent serious injury.

That possibility makes every false alarm worth it.